Goodness, where to start ...? J and I trotted down to Hatiatai Beach today to 'look at the water' to see if it was okay for swimming after the storm. As we looked over the railing, I stepped sideways and my foot went right down through a hole that was already in the decking!
(Pause ... for sharp in-drawn breaths from my four readers)
And it wasn't just my foot that went through a hole in the deck, but most of my leg went in too, right up past the knee. I guess I was like some hilarious character in an old Keystone Cops comedy, with my leg dangling down above the water. Ah, the sitcom queen strikes again.
I angrily yanked myself up from out of the hole, with the jagged end of the broken floorboard painfully scraping my knee. Sigh, I should have kept up with my diet and I might've ended up with skinnier legs.
I'd determined to pull my leg out quickly regardless of pain because in the instant of it happening I'd got mind-pictures of little kids with their heads caught in railings and the firemen being called to get them out ofr it, and photographers everywhere ... and I saw me surrounded by fire engines and cameramen, and amateur photogs and umpteen pictures of me going viral on youtube, and my never living the experience down, etc, etc..
Consequence: 1. I rang Wellington City Council and gave them an earful. 2 I went to the doctor. I have an extremely badly bruised knee and a big red graze going down the side of my leg that bled for a time. The doc reckons the knee bruise will end up getting much bigger. He says by tomorrow, I'll hardly be able to move, I'll be so stiff and sore.
My friend J was laughing so hysterically that I figured she was going to wet her knickers if she wasn't careful. And I'll admit, yes, I laughed, too. J told me that one second I was the same height as her but then - voom! - she lost me!
It wasn't until I got home and the pain started to truly kick in that I didn't feel like laughing.
Oh, we never went for a swim.. Maybe tomorrow......